Coaching Blog

It's almost impossible to the miss the story about the two 'life coaches' in Brooklyn who committed suicide this week. That story is everywhere, because it's so ironic. The two actually co-hosted a radio show called, The Pursuit of Happiness!

Apparently, they failed to find it.

This post isn't about them. They clearly were in a lot of pain and their passing is tragic.

This post is rather about the subtext of the media frenzy (okay, it's a small frenzy; let's just call it media attention) surrounding this story.

The subtext asks...

1. How could these life coaches help anyone find happiness, when they were clearly miserable, themselves?
2. Were these life coaches hypocrites?
3. Would you want a life coach who is suicidal?
4. Aren't there any requirements to calling yourself a life coach?
5. How can you trust anyone who calls him/herself a life coach, when they might be depressed, mentally ill, suicidal, or who knows what?

In answer to number 4: No. There are no legal requirements to calling yourself a life coach. Yet.

That means my dog could be a life coach. She may be more qualified than some human life coaches.

And I'm not just singling out life coaches. Business coaches, executive coaches, career coaches, health coaches. None of these titles means anything. In today's world, everyone, including bill collectors, can and do call themselves coaches.

The guy selling vitamins at the health-food store is a nutrition coach. The woman who works at the dress shop is a retail coach. The manager at a telemarketing company is a sales coach.

None of these phrases means anything, because they have come to mean whatever anyone wants.

Right now, there is maximum freedom in the coaching industry, because there are no real legal requirements. That allows massive creativity and growth and that's great for coaches and can be great for clients, too. Although the situation appears to be changing and the suicide story may speed up that change.

The real problem these days is for the consumer who doesn't know whom to trust.

The answer, of course, is credentialing and industry oversight, but a lot of 'coaches' are fighting it.

• They say it's an evil plot by established coaches to keep out the competition
• They say a piece of paper won't help them coach any better
• They say it's an effort to control coaches, or to sell them training and certifications

Really?

That first argument is just paranoid. The second is true. Although, I've seen hundreds of coaches learn to coach much better, while on the way to qualifying for a piece of paper. And the last may, or may not be true, but it's not a good enough reason to not get certified.

Life coaches get certified because they want to be the best they can be. Because they are committed to their profession. Because they feel it is the right thing to do. Because they are proud to be certified. They also get certified to distinguish themselves from the worst of the worst.

Consumers look for assurances that they can trust the life coaches they hire. And they deserve some assurance. That assurance often takes the form of a certification.

I got my first coach certification a decade ago and have qualified for several more, since. I've learned something new with each one. I'm not finished.

Although I believe more in learning than I do in credentials, I've noticed that the goal of credentialing is an effective way to stay focused on learning. It has worked for me and for thousands of other good coaches.

I sell training and certifications to coaches mostly because I want to help good coaches distinguish themselves from ineffective or dishonest coaches. It's an honor to work with people who are committed to being their best. Whether you get certified by my organization or some other, get certified.

Certified Life Coach means something. IAPPC, IAC or ICF Certified Life Coach really means something.

It's time to stop calling yourself just a life coach.

If you want to explore the path to coach certification, click below:

I've written previously about how executive, business and life coaches make money. And we have a free eBook that goes into detail about life coach salaries. But here's something we don't often write about: How else do professional coaches make money?

Average salaries for executive, business and life coaches range between $50,000 - 150,000USD for COACHING services. But most coaches have a few other services that they also offer, which can boost their salaries well into the high six figures.

The ICF has just released this helpful infographic on the "Extras" of coaching. In other words, extra services. Below it, you'll find a link to sign up for the Life Coach Salary eBook, to learn more about how coaches make money and how to set your coaching fees.

 

To get the FREE Life Coach Salary eBook, click below:

Have you ever wondered about life coach salary rates or how much money executive or business coaches make? Or are you setting up a coaching business and wonder how to set your own coaching fees? Or are you wondering if you should become a coach? If you said YES to any of these then you need to read the new information-packed FREE eBook: Life Coach Salary.

We took several of our most popular coaching blog posts and added the 'How to Set Your Coaching Fees' worksheet, previously only available to SCM students. Then we combined them into an information-rich free ebook. It's a quick read that will help you understand how much professional coaches make, how coaches set up their businesses for profitability and how to set your coaching fees with confidence.

Let's face it, confusion is the enemy of success. This free eBook can wipe out your confusion about coaching costs and help you take the next step toward becoming a successful life, business or executive coach.

You'll learn:

• Worldwide trends in executive, business and life coaching
• How much do executive, business and life coaches make?
• How many clients does the average business, executive or life coach have?
• Why every coach needs a steady paycheck
• Why coaching costs so much
• Why setting your fees too low can backfire for you and your clients
• How to set your coaching fees so your clients get what they want and your coaching business is successful

If you want a full coaching practice, you can't afford not to read the FREE Life Coach Salary eBook:

 

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by Julia Stewart, MCC

Mr. President, as a life coach, I don't hand out a lot of advice. I have a deep bag of tools I use to help my clients be, do and have what they want and advice is the least of it. But when it's needed, it's needed.

You're an awesome speaker and I was surprised you didn't wipe the floor with your opponent in the last debate. What's up with that?

Judging from his passion, Romney got some terrific coaching before that debate. For the first time in this campaign, he didn't look like his eyes were clueless about what his mouth was saying. Genuine and commanding, he looked like the kind of guy we want for President. (Apparently, he's a closet moderate, after all!) But he still has an uphill climb. Voters may forget flip-flops, but they don't forget insults. Memories of 'Etch-a-Sketch' and '47%' will accompany them into voter booths in November.

You know all that and you also know that you looked like a high school kid who forgot his homework through much of the debate. You didn't make it though Harvard Law, the US Senate and on to the White House, all in lightening speed, by being a guy who shows up anywhere unprepared.

I think something else was going on. Do you mind if I share?

A few years ago, when you were newly elected President Obama, I wrote a post written for life coaches on the importance of keeping up with our clients' rapid growth. It was called, Coach Who They're Becoming, Not Who They've Been and I used you as the example.

But I'm wondering if maybe you got stuck showing up as who you were, instead of who you are, when you went toe to toe with Romney.

You've written about the challenge of showing up as a trustworthy African American when white Americans react to assertive black men as aggressive or even scary. You've brilliantly managed how others perceive you by consistently showing up confident, at ease, polite, but never aggressive.

Well, it's four years later and Americans no longer see you primarily as a black man running for President. We see you first and foremost as The President: The most powerful man on earth, the leader of the free world, our Commander and Chief.

We need you to be more commanding.

This is a defining moment for both you and the country. Yes you can speak as Commander and Chief to a distinguished white man on television and we will cheer you on. Own it.

Normally, if you were my client, I'd ask you what it means to you to be President and why it matters. I suspect you've already reviewed that along with your talking points.

In your rare and marvelous case, you can own what it means to be the first African American President who can publicly stand in his power in a situation that nobody could even imagine a few years ago.

Go for it.

 

Guest Post by Coach Angela Goodeve, CCC. Angela is a member of School of Coaching Mastery's Ultimate Coach Training Program, a winner of Best Coaching Blogs 2012 and a board member of Women For Change.

September 11, 2001 was a day of great sorrow.  We will never forget the shock of learning of the great tragedy that day.  I will also never forget the moments of silence when people from all over the world came together to pray for those effected by this horrible tragedy.  I sat in the lunchroom at our office with tears in my eyes for all of the beautiful souls who lost their lives that day, as many others did.

The one thing that resonates today is that just as we all came together in sorrow that day, we can also come together in peace.  

There are and have been many ambassadors for peace in the world:  Mother Teresa; Oprah Winfrey; and Tony Robbins, to name a few.  Even though we as individuals may not have the notoriety of these other powerful people, each of us as individuals can be our own Ambassadors of peace.  

Life Coaches also help bring peace to the world, one person at a time, so let’s take the lessons of 9/11 to recognize and get to know some of the less well known, but equally important ambassadors of change.

Just as the School of Coaching Mastery provides accessible, quality training for Life Coaches, Women For Change Coaching Community brings together a community of support to make coaching accessible for all women who are seeking positive change in their lives.  They offer one-on-one coaching, for a nominal fee, as well as monthly workshops for clients geared toward skill building, such as money management, job search, self-esteem or other topics in which clients express interest. They are also dedicated to providing coaches in their community with the support that they need to help people live happier more peaceful lives.  

And let’s not forget all of the wonderful Life Coaches who have a passion for helping others live a life in which their needs are met; their values are expressed in everything they do; and can easily step into their personal greatness!

Let’s make every day a day in which we come together in Peace, just as we have come together in sorrow.

What will you do today to contribute to humanity and come together in peace?

To learn more about Women For Change and other opportunities for life coaches to support positive change, join the IAC North American Virtual Chapter:

Image by xlordashx

 

Not long ago, one of my life coach students, who was transitioning from a regular job to owning her own life coach business, commented in class that she was going to miss getting a steady paycheck. I’ll bet! What life coach wouldn’t miss a guaranteed salary?

Well here’s a secret about life coach salary (or executive or business coach salary): Even if you work for yourself, you need a steady paycheck.

No, I didn’t say you need to get a steady job. Your coaching business needs to pay you a steady salary. You really can have the best of both worlds!

This is the first lesson in business finance. But unfortunately for me, I missed this lesson for several years. The result? a constant feast or famine condition that wreaked havoc in my checking account and my life.

This chaos created inordinate stress about money and made it nearly impossible for me to invest, save or even have fun with my money, because I was constantly uncertain how much would be coming in.

The answer? I started paying myself a salary. Stress canceled. Uncertainty eliminated. Balancing my checkbook? No problem!

Actually, the benefits of paying yourself a life coach salary are so numerous that I’m not going to even try to cover them all in this blog post. But before you take action, check with your accountant or attorney.

In my case, getting started with a life coach salary was as simple as transferring a set amount of money every Friday from my business account to my personal checking account. But even if you choose a formal payroll, which has some benefits, it can be simple and easy.

How can you start paying yourself a paycheck right away? Take a look at how much money your business brought in the last 3 to 6 months. Average it and subtract your business expenses. That’s your potential salary.

Then take a look at how much you think you need to live on (don’t forget to include estimated tax payments and savings of at least 10%). If what you ‘need’ is more than what your business can afford to pay you, start simplifying your life or get more creative. (For me, it’s a fun game to ask, ‘How could I get this for free or nearly free?’ For instance, I discovered that it’s much more fun and rewarding to check out movies from my library than it is to pay a bloated cable fee.) But if you really can't pay yourself enough, there's no shame in getting a part-time job, until you can.

The funny thing is, although what I initially paid myself seemed like too little, I nearly always had extra money left over at the end of the month - in addition to the money I intentionally saved.

Does this seem too limiting, or at least, not exciting enough? Well if you love excitement, go for the chaos. And if you’re really crazy (been there), try enforcing ‘wealth consciousness’ on yourself while you’re struggling to pay your bills.

Me? I find it much more exciting (in a good way) now that I’m free to plan my financial life based on some solid projections.

As for wealth consciousness, it’s fun watching my savings accounts grow.

And that small salary that I started out with?

One year after I started paying myself a life coach salary, I was able to double my pay.

 

Want to learn more about how life coaches really make money?

The number one question that business and life coaches ask me over and over and over is, 'How do I get coaching clients?', which is code for, 'How do I make money as a coach?'

At any given time, there seems to be a large percentage of coaches who are hungry for more paying clients. Some of them even have a limiting belief that you can't really make a living as a coach.

This flies in the face of the facts:

• Business and life coaching have been cited again and again as one of the fastest-growing professions by media outlets like CNNMoney, the Wall Street Journal, Forbes, etc., etc.
• According to organizations that survey professional coaches and the people who hire them, most coaches make between $160 and $325 per hour.
• According to experts who've worked with millions of people (such as Oprah) everybody wants a better life, which helps explain the insatiable demand for life coaches.

So how is it possible that any coach doesn't have all the clients and money s/he could ever want?

• Marketing mavens will tell you that you need better marketing.
• Sales trainers will tell you that you need to close more sales (Well duh.)
• Coach trainers (like me) will tell you that good coaching skills practically sell themselves (I'm biased, but it's true).
• Law of Attraction gurus will tell you that you just need the right mindset (If it were really that simple, everyone would be a millionaire).

None of these solutions gets to the heart of what stops the majority of coaches from succeeding wildly - even the ones who are good coaches and do their best to learn everything that should help them succeed.

In fact, if you're honest with yourself, you already know why some business and life coaches aren't more successful, because this holds you back, too.

It holds everybody back at some point, including me. What I'm talking about is fear of rejection, shame, humiliation, failure, and being laughed at. It's the single strongest fear that humans feel, one so strong that it can make soldiers march into certain death, rather than live with the shame of running away. Sit with that for a moment...

Does it make sense that not one of the solutions I listed above really helps with this?

Well let me back up. They can help. They do help. Sometimes. But if fear of screwing up stops you from spreading the word about your new business and asking people to help you -- heck! -- if it stops you from asking people for their business; then learning a new program won't help you make more money as a coach.

So what will help?

Here are some things that have helped my coaching clients:

• Admit you have the fear and don't try to avoid how yucky it feels (people born to my generation -- Boomers -- or later, tend to avoid uncomfortable feelings, to their detriment)
• Ask the fear how it's trying to help and then let it help you (imagine it's a person who can talk and imagine what it would say. I know that sounds crazy, but it's an awesome tool for listening to your unconscious thoughts and for getting the best advice, ever.)
• Feel the fear and do it anyway (reach out to people, tell them how you can help them, etc.)
• Stay in action until the fear subsides (we stop fearing the things we do everyday)
• Model yourself after someone who's already succeeded ('fake it 'til you make it' is far wiser than it sounds)
• Hang out with people who've succeeded (You become who you hang out with)
• Don't hang out with people who are struggling (Research shows that folks who have the same problems, tend to reinforce those problems in each other and do worse, as a result)
• Become someone that other people want to hang out with (do what it takes to succeed and other successful people will hang out with you. That becomes a virtuous circle that creates more success for all.)
• Work with someone who understands and can help you (Like a really good mentor coach)
• Ask yourself if you really, really want it, because if you do, and you don't do as much of all of the above as you need to, you're out of integrity (that alone, will stop you from attracting clients)
• Stop making excuses for not taking calculated risks like, 'I'll launch my business when I have more money, more confidence, more blah, blah, blah...' (People who think that way tend to wind up losers.)
• Don't take a 'No' answer from the Universe (old-fashioned determination still works).

Once you've fully dealt with your fear of rejection and failure, then the right training or marketing program will start to work 'like magic'.

What about you? What form of fear stops you from attracting plenty of coaching clients? Share below in the comments section.

Learn how the Coach 100 process obliterates new-coach fears:

 

Guest post by Coach, Angela Goodeve, CCC. Angela is a member of School of Coaching Mastery's Ultimate Coach Training Program. Visit Angela's blog here. Angela is a contestant in the Best Coaching Blogs 2012 Contest.

Ok, Spiral Dynamics Coaching is a little complex, so if you are in a light mood, or it starts giving you a headache, you may want to bookmark this post until later!!!

When I first started leaning about Spiral Dynamics at School of Coaching Mastery, my first reaction, like many others, was “huh??”; My second reaction was “hmm, this is interesting…”; my next was “wow, this is REALLY interesting”; and my next was “Why haven’t we heard of this before???”.

I have a four-year degree in Psychology, have attended many educational conferences, and have been into personal development for a very long time, but not once have I heard of Spiral Dynamics until studying it at School of Coaching Mastery, at least not in a meaningful and detailed way!

 

This is what I have learned so far about Spiral Dynamics:

• Spiral Dynamics has been used with individuals; governments; and in marketing, and has been beneficial in all of these settings;
• This psycho-social-spiritual theory was first proposed by psychology professor, Clare Graves, PhD, in the 1950’s, and has been referred to as the “The Theory that Explains Everything” by MacLean’s magazine.  It was later clarified by Dr. Don E. Beck and Dr. Christopher Cowan in their seminal book, Spiral Dynamics, Mastering Values Leadership and Change; and
• The theory combines biology, psychology, and sociology in trying to describe differences in human thinking and behavior.

So, what IS Spiral Dynamics???

Spiral Dynamics describes human thinking in terms of an evolution of individual and societal value systems.  According to the theory, each individual, culture, and society follows a succession in levels of thinking, that are characterized at each stage as a different value system that guides not only the person’s thinking, but their behavior, and their interaction with others, and the world around them.

Each stage, for simplicity, has been organized into a color system that describes different value systems and ways of thinking. 

 

The key things to remember when learning about these value systems and stages are:

• There is no “right” or “wrong” way of thinking;
• That the world needs people who think at different levels along the “spiral” to survive;
• When we move on to the next “stage” we integrate the values of the previous “stages” so that we can utilize them if needed;
• A person, culture, or society can “spiral” back to a previous stage in certain circumstances, and may become “stuck” at an earlier way of thinking;
• Lower levels are not aware of the existence of the higher levels;
• Individuals and Societies are best served by leaders, including coaches, who are thinking at the higher levels, who can recognize others at different stages along the “continuum”, and use this knowledge to help solve issues according to the applicable ways of thinking, or value systems.

The “stages” are as follows (they will be described in terms of the individual for simplicity):  

• Beige – At this stage, the individual’s mainly thinking of survival, much like an infant ‘s physical concerns and biological needs;
• Purple - The individual sees the benefits of a Family/Tribe, and safety and security in numbers.  Much like a toddler they are influenced by ritual, and believe in the “guidance” of their “Chief”, or Parents.
• Red - This stage is very egocentric, and adheres to the principles of:  dominance, power, and control, much like teenagers typically assert themselves;
• Blue - Sees the world, and interacts with it, according to rules and authority that they believe brings stability, order, and meaning;
• Orange - Evolves in their values and thinking towards achievement, competition, and success.  They thrive on opportunities, and are driven to a “better way of living”.
• Green - Is concerned with humanity, love, harmony, and purpose (think 60’s hippy!!)
• Yellow - Places high value on flexibility, independence, and a certain knowing about themselves.  They care less about what others think, and more about doing what one chooses, an existential way of being.
• Turquoise - Is a more holistic way of thinking, in terms of consciousness, life force, and the “global community”.

So, what does this all mean to coaches, and how is learning about this going to benefit us in terms of our interactions with, and understanding of others?

For one, it reminds us that we are all individuals, with different value systems, ways of thinking, and different ways of interacting with the world.  It therefore follows that we cannot assume that any individual does, or should think the same way we do.

Knowledge of this theory can also help us in coaching and communicating with others, whether it is on an individual level; through professional coaching, via marketing; or in a more global sense.  If we can understand where another person is coming from in term of their values and thinking, then we can tailor our communications to that person, audience, or community to foster a stronger connection.

As Coaches, if we can understand where our Clients are coming from in terms of their values and thinking, we can help them find solutions that are appropriate for them, and that will resonate with them much better!

Since this is a pre-pre-101 to Spiral Dynamics blog article, you may want to visit some other sites to read more about it:  I found this one helpful in deepening my understanding.

You can also take the Introduction to Spiral Dynamics for Coaches at School of Coaching Mastery.

If you have heard about Spiral Dynamics, I would love to hear your comments!  Let’s get the discussion going!

Peace and Love,

Ang :)

School of Coaching Mastery teaches a Spiral Dynamics course tailored to the needs of business and life coaches. It's part of the Ultimate Coach Training Program:

Saturday, I attended an all-day seminar with Marianne Williamson, the best-selling author, speaker and spiritual teacher who popularized the profoundly mysterious Course in Miracles that thousands of spiritual seekers have studied.

The Midwestern New Age community was out in force for the event (Conversations overheard in the ladies room could have come straight out of Shit Life Coaches Say.)

Life coaches can be pretty New Age-y, especially when they are new. But what I like about Marianne is that she's the real deal. Instead of dressing in flowing tie-dye and spouting the latest spiritual-sounding gobbledygook (I'm totally downloading!) She's dressed in a simple pantsuit and not afraid to use some hard language.

Those who are truly evolved tend to be more  bracing than comforting. They aren't particularly warm and fuzzy. Marianne's a great example. She ended her 8-hour seminar with, 'God bless you. Now go kick some ass!'

High points of the event:

• Marianne told us all of our problems are directly related to what we're not giving. An African American woman raised her hand and said her problem was having to live with racism and she didn't see how that was about what she hasn't given. Marianne could have told the woman that her problem was that she hadn't forgiven. Instead she commented that racism continues in America because there's never been a national atonement. So she asked all black Americans to stand up and a white American stood with each. Each white American asked for forgiveness and each African American gave it. That's a healing conversation if ever there was one. There were many tears. Some were mine.
• She said it's easy to make fun of the consciousness movement, because since it avoids the negative, it lacks gravitas. We need to focus more on what's not working and take responsibility for it (again, every problem is about what you're not giving). Reminds me of what another bracing spiritual teacher, Andrew Cohen, says in his book, Evolutionary Enlightenment, that we need to notice everything and avoid nothing. Otherwise, we're choosing not to evolve. (So all you coaches who avoid the news, if you want to evolve, or not be made fun of, you need to stop avoiding what's going on.)
• You know that famous quote from the Dalai Lama about how, 'The world will be saved by the Western woman.'? Marianne's reply, 'Do we really need a man to endorse that?'
• She said if Western women cared as much about the world as they do their careers, 17,000 children wouldn't die of starvation everyday.
• She told us that it's easier to teach political skills to conscious people than it is to teach consciousness to politicians. Therefore, it's our responsibility to get more politically involved (She'll be teaching a course on how to do that in November).
• When someone stood up and asked her to run for President, she said she can better serve by helping other conscious people run and that's what she's working on.
• Kick ass, indeed!

By the way, I lunched with veteran coaches, Joanne Waldman, Kristi Arndt, and  Lynne Klippel. None spoke a single New Age syllable.

Become a master coach...

Mattison Grey sent me the 'Shit Life Coaches Say' video the same day that I got an invitation to create a TEDed Lesson. So voila! I made a coach training lesson out of it.

That was also about the time I set up a Pinterest account and started linking it to some old 'How Not to Coach' videos from SCM. Some of them are quite funny and 'Shit Life Coaches Say' fits right in.

The embed below is from Pinterest. View the TEDed lesson here.

 

Like all How Not to Coach videos, this one has some truth to it. Newer coaches quickly adopt the language of the profession and love to talk the talk with each other, because they all 'get it'. Nothing wrong with that. Except...

If you can't put something into plain language, you probably don't really understand it, yet. And that makes it hard to communicate it to non-coaches ~ including those you'd like to have for clients. Move away from using jargon as soon as you can.

Oh, and if being laughed at makes you uncomfortable, get used to it. Life coaching is a recognized profession and like all others, it's a target for jokes. Remember the one about the doctor, lawyer and priest?